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  • Tiffany Ross MS, MFT, ED.S, Ph.D

When the Decision Made Hurts...

"This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live." -Deuteronomy 30:19 NIV

We are not always fully aware of the patient’s intentions of their pregnancy after they leave us...

They have a number of outside influences impacting their decisions. Our patients are overwhelmed, underpaid, have low family support, and are often wondering, “How did I get myself into this?”

We prayerfully and carefully present them with truth and instill hope. We pray for them and love each one of them with the most pure and sincerest of love. This is because we believe that’s how our heavenly Father loves us.

Even when being the hands and feet of Jesus on Earth, we can’t override a person’s will which leaves us questioning whether we did everything in our power to reach her. The reality is, sometimes we don’t know until much later.

That was the case with a young lady who came to us and discovered that she was pregnant, but later decided to terminate the pregnancy. After meeting with our staff, it was obvious that this young lady needed something more. As time passed, she contacted us to schedule a post-abortion consult where she revealed a life filled with pain, turmoil, and negative relationship patterns. This young lady simply felt hopeless.

This story is sadly no different from most of the young women we see on a daily basis. The above scripture can be applied to physical life and death, but also indicates spiritual death and offers a solution—choose life. Through examining the loss, we continue to pray and show God’s grace and love, realizing that love covers a multitude of faults.

With the Word of God and the resources we provide, we were able to minister hope, provided a safe place for her to be able to forgive herself, and to begin self-evaluating her future.

We didn’t see this young lady many times afterwards, but I am certain that the seeds of truth, value, and hope were sown to this young lady and many others that find themselves in similar situations.

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